Hey. I’m Matt Ruby (firstname.lastname@example.org). I live in Brooklyn and I'm a standup comedian and the creator of Vooza, a video comic strip about the tech world. This is Sandpaper Suit, a comedy blog about standup, filmmaking, and whatever else I feel like talking about. Established 2006. Phew, that's a while.
Check out the similarity between these Foxx and Pryor bits on the way people smell in Africa:
Not the most original idea here so I can def see how Foxx would come up with it on his own. But then again, could Foxx really not know the Pryor bit at all? It's from "Live at the Sunset Strip," one of Pryor's biggest concert movies.
Howdy you. Flying Carpet's back in action this Thursday. It'll be UPSTAIRS at Mo Pitkin's and free. Starts at 7pm *sharp* so don't lollygag.
FLYING CARPET FREE Standup Comedy Extravaganza Thu, Aug 30 at 7pm Mo Pitkin's (Upstairs) Ave A btwn 2nd and 3rd Streets http://www.mopitkins.com/
COMICS: Demetri Martin (http://www.demetrimartin.com/) Joe Alexander (http://www.myspace.com/kingjaffi) Matt Ruby (http://www.sandpapersuit.com) Raquel D'Apice (http://www.myspace.com/theuglyvolvo) Matt Maragno (http://www.myspace.com/mattmaragno) Sean O'Connor (http://www.myspace.com/thecomedyofseanoconnor) Brooke Van Poppelen (http://www.myspace.com/brookevpcomedy) ...and special guest!?
* The picture on the flyer is of a stingray. I took it at the Baltimore Aquarium. But quite a few people who have seen this flyer see something different when they look at it. They see female naughty parts. You know what I call these people? Perverts.
** That said, it would be pretty awesome if a girl referred to her jj as a "stingray." Ladies, work on it.
And you can also catch me at Michael Mattera's Transmissions show on Monday night. Details below...
Transmissions - Monday August 27th @ 9pm
Here's the Lineup:
Colin Kane: The Village Lantern, Caroline's Comedy Club Mindy Raf: Mo' Pitkins, Vh1, College Humor.com, The Post Show Jamie Lee: Archers of Ha, The Village Ma Carolyn Castiglia: Vh1, MTV, ....and pretty much every alt. room Matt Ruby: The Comedy Village, Mo' Pitkins Dan Soder: K-Rock radio, The Comedy Village, Stand-Up NY Amanda Beales: The Boston Com. Fest., The Laugh Lounge, Comix
Monday August 27th, 2007 - 9:00P "Transmissions" @ The Slipper Room 167 Orchard Street (corner of Stanton) Manhattan , NY Cost: $5 Cover....NO DRINK MINIMUM!
Paraphrase: "It's not about the lines, it's about the connection. Connection is more important than being witty or clever or the lines you've written."
That's David Steinberg's p.o.v. on why he and Johnny Carson worked so well together. With Steinberg, Carson could abandon his notes and just go with the flow. The audience sensed that and was turned on by it.
It's true for the standup/audience relationship too. If they feel a connection with you, you're way closer to laughs. It's a good reason to be ok with abandoning written material in order to just talk to the room.
Thank you people who buy those Live Strong bracelets. You've really made a difference. You spent a whole $1 to fight cancer. Most people think a dime or .50 is enough. Not you. You've gone all in to combat this killer. You are clearly living strong. I tip my hat to you. And I'm inspired. I'm off to fight global warming by throwing a couple of ice cubes in the ocean.
And also thank you to the people who wear those ribbons for a charity. You know, the ones that symbolize that we need to save the whales who have breast cancer and work in sweatshops in Darfur. Nothing says "we're taking a REAL stand" more than synchronized accessorizing.
Second off, who cares? It's obvious how lame the show is: The tryout process is rigged (all contestants already determined beforehand). The judges, ex-contestants, are comics who are less funny than a lot of the auditioners. Shows are edited terribly (the routines are chopped up so bad you don't even know what's happening). The laugh tracks are way overdone and the cut-to-audience-member-laughing-hysterically takes are way fake. And some guy in a gorilla mask keeps showing up. Cuz gorilla masks are so funny!
Was chatting with a pro comic the other night and I asked him what he knows now that he wishes he knew when he was starting out. His answer: Write more. "There's nothing I'm writing now that I didn't have the insight and knowledge to write ten years ago. I just didn't work hard enough at it then." What about having to deal with a day job? "There's always time." Does that feeling go away? "I always feel I should have another hour of material more than I do."
Guys who wear a lot of keys on their belts are telling the world, "I'm really good at opening doors and really bad at opening bras."
I'm determined to win the oscar for Best Actor. I'm waiting for the perfect role though: A blind, gay, retarded cripple who has AIDS. During the holocaust. Can you say shoe-in?
Fake crying is called crocodile tears. This must make things tough for emotional crocodiles. "Don't even act like you're really sad that gazelle got away, Carl." How can you even tell if a crocodile is crying anyway? They live in water.
I like to write jokes that are offensive on multiple levels. Example: Why do Jewish women have such big tits? Because that's where they store all their complaints. Check and mate.
Little known fact: Everytime a firefly lights up, he's receiving a text message. Sample: "Chilling by flowers. Where r u?"
You can sum up all of American politics this way: Democrats want their mommy. And Republicans want their daddy. And right now, it's like Mommy's been on vacation and Daddy's been in charge of the house and while it was fun for a while the laundry is piling up, we're all sick of eating fast food every night, and there's a really incompetent Attorney General staying with us.
I like this argument against gays: "God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve." Oh, I didn't know you were bringing hard science into this! This argument is pretty much the same as saying, "Being gay is unnatural because the unicorns and the dragons told me that's true! And the abominable snowman said to be pro-life, so I'm pro-life. And the Loch Ness Monster told me we shouldn't appoint activist judges to the Supreme Court either."
The best line from ZZ Top's "Legs": "She's got legs...and she knows how to use them." As opposed to "She's got legs, but she's a parapalegic"!? Is knowing how to use your legs that impressive? Pretty low standards guys. Line they almost went with: "She's got a pulse and her blood is still pumping."
I know why you're not laughing at any of these. It's because you hate freedom.