Where it's at

So I perform every Monday at Stand Up NY. Two out of the past three weeks, Chris Rock has shown up and done a 40+ minute set of new material. No promises he'll be there again but it's always a fun, weird show with some good comics on the bill anyway. Plus, you can get in for free (normally $15 cover) if you say "comp cover for Matt Ruby." Still a two-drink minimum though. But you're a fucking lush anyway so what do you care?

Monday, April 16 (and every Monday)
236 W 78th St (btwn B'way and Amsterdam)
9pm show

Rock's set last week was great but my favorite moment of the night was before he even showed up. Another comedian got a woman in the audience to admit she's had a finger up her ass. So what? Well, she was sitting in between her teenage daughter *and* her mother-in-law at the time. Scandalous! And that poor girl...it's like they say: A moment on the lips, a lifetime in the therapist's chair.

What's that? You don't want to go all the way uptown to see me perform? Alright, quit your whining. I've got a couple of East Village shows coming up too.

On Thursday, April 26 I'll be doing a set at Grandma's Candy Box, a weekly show at Bar None. It's free and they have cheap drinks. Last time I performed there, the room was full of drunken cops and one of the comics nearly got arrested. Good times! Details:

Thursday, April 26
98 3rd Ave (btwn 12th & 13th St)

And here's some "save the date" shit: On Thursday, May 10, some friends and I are putting on "Flying Carpet," a comedy extravaganza at Mo Pitkin's. On the bill: Kristen Schaal, Andres Dubouchet, Joe Alexander, Brian Koppelman, Dan Soder, Landon Kirksey, and more. All for only $3. It'll be a grand time.

34 Ave A (btwn 2nd and 3rd St)
Thursday, May 10

The end.

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