Sandpaper Suit is NYC standup comic Matt Ruby's (now defunct) comedy blog. Keep in touch: Sign up for Matt's weekly Rubesletter. Email firstname.lastname@example.org.
A guy I know was really into this girl and I asked him what happened with that. He said, "I got tired of her playing games." Fellas, I think it's important to note that when a woman doesn't like you, that's not her "playing games." She just doesn't like you. She couldn't be more serious about it. No girl is looking at her phone going, "Gah, I really want to answer his call...but then I lose at Heartbreak Jenga!"
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Maybe your friend was dating someone too young for him. "Hey Sweetie what do you want to do tonight? Live Jazz? Symphony in the Park? Oh...Apples to Apples. Again."
Or maybe it was somebody too old for him.
"Hey sweetie, what do you want to do tonight? Sex? Drugs? Rock and roll? Oh... mah-jong and canasta again."
Or maybe it was someone who was just right.
"Can you understand the instructions? ... Neither can I ... Wanna fuck?"
Yooooo don't be steppin to Apples to Apples!!! Although to be fair, that game really only works for large groups, so I could see how it would be a drag if it was just the couple playing together.
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