Following me on Twitter? If not, you're missing out on quips like these:
Saw a guy with FULL face tattoo. Musta seen Tyson's face tattoo and
thought, "Nah, too subtle."
Can't believe I heard a commercial that starts out this way: "From the
director of Wild Hogs..." Maybe it's an ad for the apocalypse!
Brooklyn Academy of Music emailer subject: "Swedish Circus, Afro-pop
ballet, New French Films, & more." What, no Sri Lankan Burlesque!?
Waiter just got very aggro with water choice. "Would you prefer
sparkling water or will you be drinking from the gutter this evening?"
Sangria = "I'll take the cheapest wine you have filled with fruit that
you were about to throw away. And leave it an open bowl!"
Lost fans aren't as annoying as The Wire fans. Lost fans only know
what's in a hatch. Wire fans know "what's wrong with society."
Sometimes when I'm in Williamsburg I can't tell if people are having
fun or making fun of having fun.
More at twitter.com/mattruby.
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