7/12/12

Bee stung lips

I got stung by a bee on Monday night. No big deal you say? This bee flew into my mouth and stung me on the lip. And do you know what happens when you get stung on the lip? It starts inflating like an air mattress. Here, look at this pic. It looks like I had a collagen implant done by Stevie Wonder. Y'know, like the kind Meg Ryan gets. Oh, that's where I cross the line with you? What? You think Meg Ryan looks good these days. C'mon. Let's get real. People, let's just learn to age gracefully. That's what I say when I look at the bags under my eyes each morning. Seriously, they're getting outta hand. I look like the last season of Friends when Joey had those bags under his eyes that were so big I'm convinced an airline woulda made him check them. Look at me talking about celebs! So this is what I've been missing out on. Let's chat about cellulite and beach photos next! Anyway, I'm getting off track here. The good news is that my lip has recovered. The human body is an elastic thing. Phew. Strangely enough, this actually happened to me once before. I was drinking a beer and a bee flew into it as I drank and then stung my lip. Apparently, my lips are delicious to bees. Beelicious? If you own a line of lip gloss, feel free to steal that name.

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