I went to a vegetarian restaurant that had "Sham" on the menu. Impressive. You're just coming right out and telling me you're trying to deceive me with an inferior product. "I'd like the Rib Off please...and some Chili Con...how do you pronounce that? Ah, Con Artist."
Vegetarians even have a product called "Wham" which is fake Spam. As if that's the problem with being a vegetarian. "You know what I miss? Meat that I couldn't identify in the first place." A vegetarian who misses Spam? Wow. That's like talking to a guy who moves to a foreign country and having this conversation...Q: What do you miss most about America? A: Jersey!
Sandpaper Suit is NYC standup comic Matt Ruby's (now defunct) comedy blog. Keep in touch: Sign up for Matt's weekly Rubesletter. Email email@example.com.
Sham and Wham
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